reflection III

I see it in the irritated push
from the rocking chair,
I've developed a fine pallet
for dissatisfaction and blame.
The same reaction to shame --
of eyes carefully lowered,
and voice carefully lowered
to avoid cracks in solidity
manically, distractedly reach
for a dog to sit in lap,
if just to avoid honesty another minute.
It can't be so hard to admit,
I say it with an avoidant flick of pen,
this is not my place to be.
someone once wrote
we're never free
till we open our eyes and breathe.